this is one of the spiders who has made my house its lair.
a few years ago i lived in a different place, and we also had a spider this size living on our door. it was brown. spotted. we named it "charlotte" to make ourselves feel better.
but i'm just going to go ahead and call this one by its proper name. shelob. indirect servant of sauron. obstacle to all who travel through mordor to mount doom. "...bloated and grown fat with endless brooding on her feasts, weaving webs of shadow; for all living things are her food, and her vomit darkness."
if you knock on my front door, i will not be answering. that door stays shut. just go home.
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